Sometimes your all just ain't enough.

I give up. I believe that I gave a valiant effort but I just. can't. do. it. anymore. Last week Tom and I were going over our family goals for the year when he says, "I think we need to re-evaluate homeschooling." I agreed that I had been thinking the same thing earlier that week when I ended up having a breakdown over my cluttered house while on the phone with a friend. We had been snowed in and stuck in the house for three weeks and my house never got clean. As soon as I got one room cleared and clean, another would be destroyed.

I know what you're all thinking, "Well, she just needs to teach her kids to clean up after themselves." To you I say a big fat,"Whatever." The point is that I had an epiphany amongst our wrecked, crowded, cabin-fevered mess. If I couldn't keep things together for a few weeks while the Tank was out from pre-K and we couldn't go outside, what the heck was I going to do next year when they were all home, all the time? Not to mention how miserable Tweedledee was with the lack of daily social interaction with her peers. Once a week at the library just wasn't enough. Tweedledum was a little disappointed when we told them but he's been fine since they started. They both love their teachers and are excited to be with their friends again.

I took them down to the school last Monday, filled out the mountain of papers and then walked them to their new classrooms. They desperately wanted to be in the same class but there weren't two spots in any one class. Tweedledum was first and interestingly enough, the class he is in is the one he was originally assigned to at the beginning of the year. Tweedledee was next and when I told her teacher that I had been homeschooling her her response was, "Yes, I know." Ummmm... do the teachers have nothing better to talk about in their spare time than the fact that I had decided to homeschool my kids? How did my family become a conversation piece in a school so large that it has five classes per grade?

While I feel that we made the right decision, I still worry about what to do when they get to middle school. I've heard nothing but the bad things that happen at the middle and high schools. How do we teach our kids to be in the world but not of it? I know that they need to learn how to stand up for their values and what they believe in, but how do we keep them from unnecessary exposure to the evils of this world? I suppose I just don't have faith in my own ability to raise my children to not make the same mistakes that I made in my youth.

the most cliche blog post

Well, I guess I'll jump on the bandwagon and post my goals for this year(which I don't think technically is a new decade since there are ten years in a decade and our current one wouldn't have started until 2001, thus making this year the tenth year? am i wrong? After all, the end of the first year, AD, would have been when Christ turned one, not the day he was born. For that matter, should we really be celebrating the new year at the end of December anyway? Okay, I'm rambling.)

1. Lose at least 30 pounds. I'm determined to start a Clean Eating approach to food even though it does not coincide at all with my favorite Christmas present, a hot chocolate machine.



2. Read my scriptures daily. I know! You're shocked that I don't already do it but it's true.

3. Write in my journal once a week. I know that every day is ideal, but seriously? I know it not gonna happen so why set myself up for failure? I even signed up for ldsjournal.com where they send you reminder emails and everything is filed safely away from natural disasters.

4. Learn to play the piano. Since we actually have a piano in our house now and my kids are taking lessons I have been inspired. I never had lessons as a child(despite my mom playing both piano and organ in church callings) and tried teaching myself in my early teens but quickly tired of the juvenile songs that were used in the learning book from when my older brother took lessons. I was able to memorize the right hand of one church hymn but quickly forgot it. I was always in choir in school and have a general knowledge of music. Time signature and all that. Plus, watching Little Einsteins with my kids for years has helped me remember all those Latin terms that are so essential in music. I've looked at reviews of a few adult piano course books and think I've found the right one. Anyone familiar with Albert's?

5. Blog more often. Because really, who out there doesn't want to read more of my thoughts on life?

6. Post more picture of my kids. Because I know that there are family members who do NOT read my blog to hear about my philosophizing of life.

7. Exercise at least 3 times a week. We have a fantastic new elliptical machine and I can count on one hand how many times I've used it.

8. Get organized! I really need to get my act together if the entire Primary program in our ward is not going to fall apart while it's in my care. I need to not feel bad about delegating things to my counselors and just let the Spirit guide me in my lessons. I also really need a secretary.



So, what are you aiming for this year?

Mommy's letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled my four children on demand, visited their doctor's office more than my doctor, sold sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the school playground and figured out how to attach nine patches onto my son's boy scout uniform with staples and a glue gun.

I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my son's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.

Here are my Christmas wishes:

I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache (in any color, except purple, which I already have) and arms that don't hurt or flap in the breeze; but are strong enough to pull my screaming child out of the candy aisle in the grocery store.

I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere in the seventh month two pregnancies ago.

If you're hauling big ticket items this year I'd like fingerprint resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music; a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals; and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone.

On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, "Yes, Mommy" to boost my parental confidence, along with three kids who don't fight and three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools.

I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting "Don't eat in the living room" and "Take your hands off your brother," because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can only be heard by the dog.

If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than room temperature without it being served in a Styrofoam container.

If you don't mind, I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season.

Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely.

It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family.

Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is ringing and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the door and come in and dry off so you don't catch cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet.

Yours Always,
Motherboard

Royalty in our Home.

This week we got a new addition to our family. Tom and I talked about it a lot, not sure if we could handle another mouth to feed, but Tom had heard a story on the radio that melted his heart.









So I took the kids to Animal Control and we found a perfect little kitten for our family.

She's a 3 month old gray tabby and she was promptly named Duchess. You know, like from Aristocats? How would we ever think of pet names without kids' tv shows? All the people in our house love her, she's very tame and cuddly and tolerates all of the Bug's physical affection. She and the dog are getting used to each other. Just now they were both laying on the sofa within breathing distance of each other and there was no noise. A vast improvement from just a few days ago when he knocked over the Christmas tree trying to get to her.

And yes, I'm still trying to fill a nurturing void that I feel by accumulating furry children.

Why didn't I think of that?

I found a great blog, Diaper and Divinity, through one of my other favorites, My Real Life Was Backordered. DeNae is hilarious, you should go check her out.

Stephanie over at Diapers started an online book club using General Conference talks. Every Sunday she picks a new talk from the last Conference and then throughout the week people can post comments to have a "discussion." I'm so excited about this because I will hopefully have an easier time working personal scripture study into my day. I can read the talk one day, read the individual scripture references following days and (if I have time) delve deeper into the meaning and circumstances surrounding the scriptures themselves. I encourage all of you to join us!

Let's play a little game....

that I like to call, "What would you do if?"

What would you do if you were called to be president of say, the Primary and the Music Leader is extremely unreliable. This person does a great job (when she shows up) and has great ideas (that sometimes get followed through on).

Now, let's also say that this person's spouse writes their own play of " A Christmas Carol." This person calls you up begging for help in filling extra slots because they need boys and hey! you have boys the right age. Then you are told that two of your kids have been cast to play the children of Scrooge's ex-girlfriend and that you are needed for the choir. Well, a couple of weeks go by and it's getting closer to time for rehearsals to start and you ask this person when you and your family are needed only to be told that the cast is full. That's right, the parts were taken away from YOUR kids and given to someone else. THEN, on Thanksgiving you are chatting with a cousin-in-law and SHE tells you that her kids are playing the children of Scrooge's former girlfriend! And in the mean time your kids keep asking when they are going to be in A Christmas Carol. You are at a loss as to what you should tell them and just change the subject each time they bring it up.

Now. You have to go out of town for an unexpected family funeral and get home very late Saturday night. The next morning, lo and behold, said Music Leader doesn't show up. No phone call. Nothing. Zip. Zilch. Then you run into said Person at Wally World the day of Opening Night for the play. She apologizes for not letting you know she wouldn't be there on Sunday but after all, she's been up to 2:30 a.m. every night working on sets for the play and oh by the way, could you help out in the box office tonight?

Not that this happened to me. It's all hypothetical. I'm just sayin', What would you do?

What could be better?!

Lately I've been having a lot of body issues. After the Tank was born I joined Weight Watchers and lost 48 pounds. I was 7 away from my goal when I found out I was expecting the Bug. I turned into an eating maniac during that pregnancy and gained back everything I had lost because I was just going to join WW again after I delivered. Well, I've struggled in losing those pounds for almost three years and lately I've hit my limit. I got back to what I weighed the first time I joined WW and I think a few extra have snuck in there.

So, in addition to getting on track and reaching my goals there's a new blog that joins weight loss with........Twilight! Eclipsed is a Twilight-themed weight-loss cheerleader. I love Twilight and can't wait for the next movie to come out. Even more, I want to be able to wear one of these shirts in a smaller size. Who's with me?


There's also a fantastic blog that gives you the entire WW program for FREE! Go to Gina's WW Recipes to find out.